I’m finally making progress, praying that I’ll continue to pick up speed.  However, I’ve also realised everytime I want to start on something, something else crops up to distract me from what I need to do – the same thing happens at my workplace as well.  Thus I’ve started writing down the things I need to do daily so that I remain focused.

I was reading the book of Ephesians this morning & this verse struck me very deeply in Eph 2:19-20 – ¹⁹Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God’s people and members of God’s household, ²⁰built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone.

What would a cornerstone be & why the significance of it?  A cornerstone is defined as a stone at the corner of a building, uniting two intersecting walls.  Such a stone, often inscribed, laid at a ceremony marking the origin of a building.

Indeed, Jesus is the chief cornerstone & we’re all like building blocks or bricks.  We can choose to be part of the building or part of the rubble surrounding the building.  We could be the rubble that chooses to destroy the building (which in this sense represents the church if each of us represent a building block as a church is not a physical building, but rather, consists of people).  As I was spending some time with God today, I was reminded & asked “What kind of building am I a part of?”.  I was reminded of how in the early days, buildings like the pyramids were built slowly, block by block & in times of the lack of machinery, it’s easy to lay the base blocks but difficult to hoist & build the blocks above it to ensure that it meets at some point & is able to close up the pyramids tightly.

Indeed, I was awed by this revelation from the Lord once again & pray that I’ll be a building block that plays the part to build & more importantly than that, I play a part to build others as well & not to tear others down.  I pray that God would continue to use me despite my weaknesses to play a major role in building His church & His people.  It’s tough work but it starts with one brick & diligently, stacking up the bricks, despite set backs & difficulties.

I visualised what I was building.  What if I’m bad at building such that I ‘miscalculated’ and built a house with not enough space to fit in a building block to cover a hole?  It might mean I’ve got to start from the scratch again.  I was telling God – that’s really tough – isn’t there an easier way?  But I guess, it’s part of learning & growing in God & His word & His ways.  I pray that I may continue to be transformed by God all the days of my life!

In the past week, I’ve started having a burden upon my heart – something that’s egging me on to do something.  Perhaps I’ve been too laid back in the aspect of using my time fruitfully to pray.  In fact, I’m a person who has a greater tendency to hear from God while I’m doing something in the midst of prayer, rather than standing still to pray for things upon my heart.  I feel that I’m able to stay awake.  However, I’ve got to stay focused in doing so & also journal intentionally (using my mobile).

Of course, there would also be times where I would just sit back & strum the guitar & allow God to speak to me through songs as well.  I’ve started praying & fasting to grow in my desire to see a greater movement of the hand of God in our midst.  I believe we’re on the brink of revival & something’s happening in my spirit to spur me into such a time.  Therefore, I’ve also set in my mind that I need to pick up & complete reading some materials related to Inner Healing.  Although there’s quite a bit of materials to plough through, I hope I can complete at least one set of them by this month.  I just realised today that a quarter of the month has passed & I haven’t quite picked that up yet.  However, I’ll be starting really soon.

Today we had the leader’s summit & I was reminded of the importance of fellowship & spending time beyond ministry matters.  It’s something that I’ve been trying to do in the past month or so, to improve in this area & catch up with various ones over meals, the phone, email etc.  I’ve started praying for individuals as well & asked God specifically for a verse to encourage them with.  These are a couple of things I’ve been trying to get going as I continue to press on.

Whenever possible, I’ll also try to bring my nephew to children’s church.  I’ve already brought him once & am intending to bring him again tomorrow.  Hopefully he’ll have heaps of fun.  My parents, together with my brother & sister-in-law would likely join as well.  However, I pray that they would be able to wake up in time for service tomorrow.

It does seem like quite a busy list & a lot of things to do.  But I’m determined to take it one-step-at-a-time & not allow things to overwhelm me.  Praying that God will continue to anoint & empower me.  It was indeed good as I spent the first day praying & fasting – was reassured of what God had in mind for me & that I’m not alone in doing what is ahead.  The task seems huge but my Lord is larger!

Today was a powerful sunday service.  I realised the difference the moment I stepped into the auditorium for pre-service prayer.  I was regretfully late today as I try to arrive in time for the district prayer but I couldn’t make it, partly due to road diversions as well.  Nevertheless, the moment I stepped into the auditorium & settled into pray, I felt a difference in atmosphere.

Even during the pre-service prayer, it was different as the Lord spoke to me about promises that the unit will grow during the harvest period – a growth we will not be expecting – but it’s a reminder that it is indeed God who brings people into our paths as we remain faithful.  Shortly after, a sister went up to give a word of prophecy that was subsequently confirmed by another person.  It was in line with the harvest, how God will tool (equip) us as we avail ourselves.  Interestingly, the sermon thereafter also shared about the various classes we could attend to ‘tool’ ourselves in the Word.

I had certain things in mind when I planned for JG for this month.  However, I felt impressed by the Lord that we needed to continue with CG matters & it was indeed a good time of talking about various challenges we faced & bouncing ideas off one another.  Thanks to those who have also given feedback on how we should have times to share about application points & work towards them.  The next feedback I’ll need to work on is how to bring this to a practical state.  Indeed ideas are flying around my head now as to how to refresh it & make it even more effective.  I’ve been saddened though by the turnout as I equate it to whether people see the value in JG.  Perhaps some more than others see the value in it.  But I need to keep focused on why we gather together so that we don’t lose the momentum.

During today’s sermon, Michael shared about the need to apply the Word into our practical lives.  Indeed, that is important and sometimes, I just feel so overwhelmed by all the things I need to do, I tell myself to take it easy so that I wouldn’t get burnout by it all.  The Lord spoke to me in the area of making a greater effort to grow in my understanding in the new ministry area He’s laid in my heart.  Surprisingly, I can be very laid-back about getting things done as well if I feel that there’s so many things to do as I can get quite divided in my attention.  So now I’ll need to focus on it & give myself a timeline to get certain things going.

I came across a prophecy that was prayed over me in Mar 2009.  It spoke about doing things in a new manner & how the Lord would drain away my weariness.  I was indeed very tired then – late last year, there were a few things in ministry that started to shake my world & made me clarify my motives for serving.  This carried on till the 1st quarter of the year.  Subsequently, in the 2nd quarter of the year, I was having a few issues at home with the family that made me even more discouraged.  I took quite a bit of time to recover from these set backs & had to repeatedly pray & rely upon the Lord to bring me out of those situations.  Indeed, it was a time that I had no choice but to wait upon the Lord & trust that He would help me see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I thank & praise God for those incidents that happened in the 1st half of the year as it’s really forced me to rely upon the Lord & seek Him for what to do next.  This has led to the formation of our JG group.  I strongly believe this is something that the Lord wants me to do in the midst of His people & to equip those amongst us for greater things ahead.  As to what my next steps are, I was reminded once again to rely & pray into being the promises that the Lord has for each & everyone of us in the unit & in the church.  Indeed, He is the builder & the cornerstone & we have been given the priesthood & we all need to be faithful in the little things He has given to us.

I’m very sure the Lord will add unto us quality & quantity in time to come.  Meanwhile, pray with me that He will do a mighty work in our midst & ask Him to use us, Amen?

I was listening to a song entitled “Brand New Day” and it reminded me of the times I’ve taken for granted simple things in life such as the ability to wake up & be healthy.  To think clearly after a good rest.  Indeed, I need to thank God daily for each new day as He gives it unto me strength & courage to face each day.  Not that each day is a battle (although sometimes it is) but rather, that each day is a blessing from God.

It’s Halloween today & many go out to celebrate it with drinks & such.  I’m not so much a Halloween fan as I don’t enjoy horror stuff.  But well, since in Singapore, we all want to celebrate something or other, here’s a Happy Halloween to all!

I finally got to shower my nephew (rather than him sitting in the bathtub, he stood up under the shower) for the second time.  Amazingly, the toilet was more wet than myself as I let him play with the shower head as I soaped him up.  After sometime, he decided to be adventurous & shower not just the bathroom wall but the toilet wall as well.  So that’s my first time that I remained pretty much dry after showering him.  The next morning as I was preparing for work however, my oldest dog Nicole went out for a walk & came back smelling like she’s been rolling in compost.  So I had to give her a quick shower before going to work.

As I was reflecting about my job & what I’m doing.  I daresay that I’ve been rather blessed that I enjoy what I’m doing despite having been in the same company for 8.5 years.  That is an amazing thing that I still can’t phantom – how could I stay so long & still not feel bored – perhaps it’s coz I’ve been transferring departments every few years to get fresh insights & expand my job scope along the way.  I’ve realised that in many cases, I was the one who was seeking for something fresh/new/exciting, else I’d never get moving.  Perhaps this is something that God has put within me to learn new insights to old things.

Currently reading a very enlightening book about “Biblical Approach to Feng Shui & Divination”.  It’s a very good book & I recommend reading some of these controversial topics with a biblical perspective.  Ultimately, as Christians, we don’t dabble with Feng Shui but to understand the context, origin of it is very interesting.  I never knew the traditional tomb stones that our ancestors were buried in were done in a feng shui fashion with the turtle, dragon, tiger in place.  However, the book also stated that some of these feng shui items were common sense (such as putting a well in the middle of the house so that it’s easy to fetch water or not building a house at the top or bottom of a hill so that it wouldn’t be subject to natural elements as badly).  Interestingly, there were also some biblical references in a very chinese/feng shui manner such as indication that the world was created & heaven & earth were separated by the sky.  In case you’re wondering, I borrowed the book from the library – yes, indeed there’s such books available at the local library.

I was listening to Corrinne May’s song entitled “My Little Nephew”.  Think she was based overseas & didn’t see much of her nephew growing up.  But the songs is really appropriate so here’s some of the lyrics: -

Every day’s a new discovery
I’m a child again looking through your eyes
Every step you’re teaching me
Out of full cried “get up and smile”

You’re growing faster with every minute
Second photograph
I wish I could spend more time with you
My little nephew

Today is the first day I spent time alone with my little nephew Jeremiah for the first time.  It started off at about 8:30am picking up at his place to go to church.  He decided that he wanted to take a train & thus, off on the train we went.  Here’s a pix taken at the train – he was so willing to smile his biggest smile.

It was taken from my mobile, so the resolution is not as clear as it could be.  Anyways, he’s got a cheeky smile.  I asked him what he wanted for breakfast & he only knew he wanted to munch.  So I had breakfast at Isle Cafe & he selected eggs & sausage – a typical American style kid in the making?  Anyhow, we had it with beehoon – so it was Asian styled, American breakfast.

Thereafter, I brought him up to join Hope Tots.  He’s definitely the biggest sized kid there – he was like Goliath in the room – think he needs space to run around coz he didn’t seem too happy when I picked him up after the service.  Nevertheless, he was pretty positive about the experience (I think) coz he got attention from the Sunday School teachers there.  Think I’ve got to bring him to the class with older kids coz he enjoys interaction with older kids more.

My arms are now aching from carrying him as he was shy & tired after that.  He slept for an hour after we left church.  To entertain him today, I sang, played & shared all my meals with him (including the wedding lunch we went to later on).  It was tiring but rather enjoyable.  Thankfully, he was in an obliging mood today & I’m so glad my prayers were answered – that I could bring him to church today & also, be able to manage him single-handedly.  Thank God for using me as a vessel in Jeremiah’s life.  I pray that I’ll be able to bring him at every opportunity (my first priority is still to my CG & unit).

The weather’s been really scorching hot these days & from what I hear from around the globe, the weather has been rather unusual all over.  Indeed, the effects of global warming are affecting us to a greater extent daily.  Even as I sleep these days in air conditioned room, I have a greater tendency to wake up to switch off the air conditioning & try to sleep through the night with only the fan switched on as it consumes a lot less electricity.  At least I’m trying to do my bit to save energy, just as I switch off the air conditioning at work when I come in as we have a centralized air conditioning in the building.

Our ancestors did not know the effects of their actions when they invented many things but as we’re made more aware of it, it requires everyone to play a part in it.  As I was thinking of these things, I’m wondering what I am a part of today that will impact my future generations down the road.  I do pray that I’ll be able to impact in a positive manner my current & future generations down the road.  I’m not sure to what extent but I pray that I would be used in whatever capacity I’ve been entrusted with to influence decisions, attitudes & perspectives such that it would be appreciated (perhaps not now, but in future).

I’ve been praying & believing God for my family to really accept Him as our personal Lord & Saviour & for the entire family to serve the Lord wholeheartedly.  I don’t see it coming to past at the moment, but whatever I can do, I endeavour to do so.  Starting with this Sunday which unfortunately can’t be every week, I will be bringing my nephew to Sunday School.  Hope he’ll enjoy himself & also learn about salvation that comes from God alone this week.

On the work-front, I’ve always been asking myself how can we draw boundaries so that moving ahead, we will not be bound by precedence set in the wrong manner.  Interestingly, the predecessors of my job made certain decisions that today, affect how we work & operate & many a times, we need to think how to overcome the issues related to it.  Thankfully I’ve got supportive bosses & we’re able to talk things through & rationalize every decision we make.  As a result, I’ve personally grown in the area of understanding situations towards making objective decisions.  I’m looking forward to an upcoming course on influencing people & decisions & I’m hoping I’ll learn tremendously from it & be able to apply in all aspects of my life.

Just finished a fictional book about some non-fictional details.  Anyhow, shan’t go into the details of the book.  But the brilliance of the characters in the book was really mind blowing – the way the mind works, the thoughts & the way the plot unfolds with it’s twists & turns – been quite a long while since I read such an interesting read – surprised that I could finish it within a week.

I’ve been pondering about the effects of brilliance.  In yesterday’s newspapers there was an article of this 2 year old boy who was admitted into Mensa due to his high IQ.  In fact, the article wrote that the boy was sharing with his parents about the reproduction system of penguins!  Brilliance is a good thing to have, but can be used as a double edged sword, depending on whom the brilliance rests upon.

Jesus said that it’s easier for the children to enter the Kingdom of Heaven than for the rich.  Sometimes, it’s good to be simple as we’re more open to things.  However, we also need to be street smart in dealing with the people of the world, whilst applying biblical principles.   In my current job, I’ve been moulded (& am still being moulded) in the area of working with different characters within the organisation.  When sharing with another believer within the organisation, I shared that I usually take a back seat as I refuse to be involved in certain matters that are ‘politically inter-twined’ and may be perceived as being nonchalant.  However, I know that if I do respond, the response would be pretty caustic.  So I try to refrain from doing so intentionally.  In the past, I would just respond in a manner that would shame the person.  No doubt I still have the thoughts of doing that – but I try to refrain from doing so as it doesn’t help to embarrass others if the matter on hand is still not resolved.

Indeed, it’s difficult to be Christ-like in a workplace that’s challenging & having to work with different people who might be pursuing different agendas.  I pray that God will continue to give me the wisdom – I do not ask for brilliance as it might solve the issue, but wouldn’t help to build bridges to the aroma of Christ.  I need wisdom in handling & managing difficult people.

I dread monotony.  However, I enjoy having schedules that are fixed.  So the difficulty/challenge comes when I need to add variety despite having some form of regularity.  This came to me in a greater measure as I was updating some databases for work & got quite bored doing so – I had to do something different every now & then to break the monotony.  Don’t get me wrong, if it was just going on for a day or so, I can still tolerate it.  But having to plow through a few hundred records & understanding the nature of the issues – I felt like I was working in a customer service center, which isn’t quite my cup of tea.  I do enjoy critical thinking, although it would be draining for me at the end of the day, but going through issues day-in & day-out for a few weeks is really draining for me personally.

This has been something I’ve been thinking about for a few months now.  How do we maintain a program but keep freshness.  How can I keep learning, without feeling staleness?  How should I bring about change in a manner that’s refreshing, but not too controversial?  The JG discipleship program that we’re starting this Sunday is something that has been on my mind since end of last year.  I still remember evaluating the past year & looking into the new year.  I was sharing with the leaders that we’re like the Moses generation (except we’ve got more time than Moses coz we’ll be entering the promised land together).  It’s up to us to train a new generation of Joshua.  I didn’t know how or what form.  There were many people who prayed over me & prophesied that this was a year I’d be drained from my weariness & also that it’ll be a year of me doing things in a new manner.  Thus the question was raised to the Lord – how new can new be?  I still don’t have the answers to the questions.  But at least, I’m seeing some light at the end of the tunnel.  I’m seeing how God is adding to me new insights & giving me new revelations.  Indeed, I need to grow a lot deeper in my relationship with God through prayer.  Something I’ve set my mind to do consistently starting from this month to train myself for things to come.

I was looking at my church camp objectives & realised that one of my objectives from last year was to grow in the area of discipling leaders.  I know that now is the time.  Indeed, it’s taken more than a year for head knowledge & understanding to sink in as a greater conviction.  Thankfully, I’ve got time to work on it & work things out.  Praying that this would be a blessing to those around me as well as myself.  We’re in this journey to learn together through JG (Joshua Generation).  I’m simply a facilitator/vessel to do God’s work in the lives of those around.  What a blessing it is to serve an almighty God & I’m so humbled by the fact that people do desire to learn.  May I always be open to learning things & not just conform to norms.

Yesterday’s message at Sunday service was something that I have been asking for specifically from the Lord.  Since July, I’ve been looking up sermons & teachings about Is 61.  Yesterday’s sermon was specifically on that.  However, I wasn’t sure I was totally ready to receive it fully.

During the worship session yesterday, I was having a conversation with God about how I wanted to be more effective for His purposes.  Once again, I was choked from all the sinus dripping into my throat.  it reached to a point where it got quite unbearable & I had to pop a flu tablet.  As I was speaking to the Lord, when He gave me a rhema word that He was healing me from that moment on.  I wasn’t sure whether it was my imagination or it was the medication.  I’ve been on a nasal spray that contains steriods in it for about 2 weeks now (previously I was on & off it).  I was getting quite fearful about this condition as I also saw my colleague suffering from it to the point that no medication could help his ailment.  As I received the word from the Lord, I claimed it by faith & sealed it in Jesus’ name.  Last night as usual,  I automatically sprayed my nasal spray & then remembered that I should continue claiming the healing, rather than to rely on medications.  Interestingly today was a rainy day – which would mean that usually my sinus would flare up pretty bad.  However, today was the first day that I did not suffer from any sinus effects of getting it dripped into my throat.  I really praise God for that!

I believe in my spirit that today was the first healing that I would see in the midst of all that God is doing for us all.  He will continue to do a deeper work of healing – not of just physical bodies but of emotional beings.  Yesterday’s sermon was enlightening as it reminded me of the importance of receiving the anointing not just for within the church – but for outside of the church & also the country.  Indeed, the Lord has constantly been reminded me of His anointing upon me in various manners which were confirmed by many others.  However, I’ve struggled to see the magnitude of that anointing & how I can really magnify His purposes in my personal life.  I’m a stickler for first getting the home in order before looking outwards, although I realise that we can get so caught up with the ‘home affairs’ that sometimes we do not allow God to use us outside of the church context.  Personally, I know that the Lord is slowly building me up with the various challenges on how to cope with all that He’s given me.  It might not be alot – perhaps just 5 bread & 2 fish – but if God can multiply that to feed thousands, indeed, He can work through me to bring about a revival.

Since 1998/9, I’ve been longing to see a revival in our city & in the world.  A revival that would bring many to know the Lord & be serious about God to know Him & experience a personal relationship with God.  Through the years, the Lord has equipped me along the way with various spiritual gifts to continue to be faithful to His purpose in my life.

Indeed, the past few weeks were tiring as I was busy preparing for different things that were upcoming & also doing planning.  I’m glad that it’s a public holiday today as it’s the first time in months since I’ve had the opportunity to wake up at 11am & also to have an afternoon nap – all this was a rarity for me but yet, so good.  Also, I’ve taken the ‘day off’ by doing certain things I enjoy doing such as landscaping the shrimp cum fish tank & also watching some shows at home.  Indeed, I could live the rest of my life just doing this & I wouldn’t be bored by it.  Yet on the other hand, since I’ve experienced the goodness of God, I can’t help but feel that I would be missing out a lot if I continued my life apart from Christ.  It’s great to serve a mighty God who’s alive in every way!

Today has got to be one of my most packed Saturdays in terms of activities.  I woke up pretty early this morning (considering I slept past midnight) and got busy with transplanting some plants in my aquarium.  Shortly after, I had to leave the house to run some errands & it was good as I managed to catch up with my dad over coffee.  Thereafter, my mom wanted to do some shopping, followed by lunch & then rush off for WFL teaching.

It was a good session as I learnt quite a few things from the other instructors as well – I’m glad I don’t have to do this alone as there’s so many things to cover & I was wondering how I’d cope with the sessions.  Indeed, that was an answered pray as I was asking God how to manage.

To end off the day, after dinner my parents & I went to the Marina Barrage for the first time – indeed, it was very nicely done up & they were having an event on the roof.  Nice place & I really enjoyed the breeze.  Finally to round off the day, we went to the Singapore Flyer.  My first time & probably my last time on the flyer for this year – if I do go up again, it’s got to be when the Integrated Resort (IR) @ Marina is up.  I found the experience alright, despite my fear of heights and when I got to the highest point, my mind started getting paranoid as to what if I got stuck there – I could fully understand & imagine the fear & helplessness the people who got stuck up there for a few hours without food & water.  I’m glad to say I got off it without any side effects & I used to think I’d probably want to parasail down if I got stuck up there but after having been to the top, I’d have to say no thanks.  In fact, I saw a ladder all around the metal frame but could imagine that my imagination would either kill me first or cause me to stay frozen up in the air, both of which would be a very terrifying experience.  Nevertheless, when I got up there in the flyer & saw Singapore’s skyline & the many things that was going up, I really thank God for a good government that has governed our nation well in terms of planning ahead & guiding our economy to ensure that it’s on track for each individual to flourish & contribute to the nation in a positive manner.

I arrived home to a whining puppy as my dad had earlier today put her on a high ledge & she jumped down daringly (probably in her playful manner) and hit the pavement really hard.  We were all so worried as she wasn’t responding to us as actively as she usually would.  Thankfully, she took dinner & finally went out to pee.  However, her jaw seems to hurt & she’s not as active or playful anymore.  I’m praying for her to be fully recovered & that the effect & fear of jumping down would not have too much an impact on her.  She’s now lying on my bed & her aunt tried to play with her but she was quite upset with her aunt – which is very, very unusual.  My dad’s feeling really horrible right now for putting Nikki on a high ledge  & I was joking with him that she was whining coz she was grumbling to me about my dad bullying her.  In fact, I was just telling my dad this morning that he keeps bullying & scolding Nikki but I know he does it out of love & affection for her & I didn’t realise that he would ‘bully’ her to this extent.  However, thankfully she’s been able to eat & keep her food down, which is a good sign, although she doesn’t seem to dare to drink water from the bottle although she looks thirsty.  Think her jaw is aching badly.  Poor gal is sulking.  Nevertheless, the good news is that I’ve just cooked fish porridge for the dogs & I’m sure Nikki will enjoy breakfast tomorrow!

What a long day it’s been but a very fulfilling one.  I do hope my Saturdays won’t be as hectic as this one as I’ll need to get more rest!