Headache

I think my headache’s the result of the hot weather we’re experiencing.  It’s really hot everywhere else but super cold in the office.  Thankfully, I’m fully aware that this is not the result of H1N1 transmission.  That’s a concern of everyone when they hear that someone’s on medical leave these days.  I woke up this morning with a bad headache & giddiness, despite plenty of sleep last night & the weekend before.  In fact, I’ve been sleeping a lot more in the past 3 weeks, probably making up for the lack of sleep, although last week’s bought of dreams were disturbing, causing me to have not much rest.

Nevertheless, God is good.  I realised that the dreams were also preparing me for some news & some things to come.  I’m starting to make sense of some of them, although I still feel that sense of frustration in the dreams I had.  It reminded of Popeye’s response “I can’t stand it no more!”  In fact, I’ve always had a sense of frustration when things aren’t done right.  I’m not sure why & sometimes, that frustrates me as well coz I feel like I’m trying to be righteous, when I’m also a sinner in God’s eyes & laws.  Thus, gotta always be careful to be objective in what I view/say.

I was pretty stressed at work the past 2 weeks or so after church camp as I had to prepare for an important presentation to the senior management.  Thankfully, my boss agreed to present to the senior management, whilst I prepared the presentation.  Indeed, it’s great when we have team work going in a team.  It really gives me a sense of fulfillment in what I’m doing.  I’m really thankful for God’s guidance throughout the preparation of my presentation, although there have been times when I felt really frustrated as my colleagues from other departments weren’t as helpful as they could be.  But then again, I’m thankful that at least I know what’s happening & was able to figure out ways around the situations.

Some friends have commented that my life is one that I can’t stay still or do nothing – I’m always doing something about some situation.  Guess I was made that way.  Even in seeking the Lord, my pathway has been through that of an activitist – or doing something that I find the significance in.  Was just talking to a colleague today about taking on another career path & she was encouraging me to do so.  I shared that basically it’s something that I wouldn’t do as I don’t have any interests in doing that as a career.

I personally feel that it’s important for us to invest our life in what we think it’s worth & make it count, despite the challenges we may have.  Perhaps some may consider it foolishness, but I consider it worthy as long as there is a value attached to it.  A quick decision may be the best way to solve the problem but making that decision without sufficient information is foolishness.  I always remember this terminology called “Bounded Rationality” – where we make decisions based on incomplete information.  This can haunt us as we may sometimes make decisions that we regret.  Indeed, recently, I have had to make many decisions that would make an impact both at work & in my personal life & the decisions were really tough.  However, it’s good that we have colleagues & friends who can advise & guide us through it all.  Indeed, when we pray, God answers through sending others along our paths.  Grateful for the colleagues & friends who have guided me & glad that most of them are believers in Christ.  :)